A New Beginning

From heaven to hell...

January 29, 2008

Today is the first day to work without my boss. Suddenly there are so much more I need to take care of. There is no one there to protect or look over for me anymore.

One major difference is the amount of meetings I have to go to. I had two meetings today, two more tomorrow and three more again the day after. I can't even do work anymore, it's just too overwhelming.

On one hand I've got a handful of meetings to attend, and they are w/ higher ups too. On the other, I have client emailing/calling me regarding website problems. On top of that, I have my big boss asking me to take care of the things my boss used to take care of. The list goes on and on...I am starting to admire my boss more and more becuz I have no idea how she handled all these and still be sane.

As a junior web designer, if I'm attending a meeting with someone more senior than me, namely my big boss, then logically it is her job to speak to the client and lead the meetings. Lucky me, this ain't gonna happen in our team. Cuz big boss doesn't have a clue about what's going on w/ the websites. She even said so herself. So "naturally" the task of speaking to client falls upon my shoulder. This is the thing that worries me the most. I think through more practice I'll get better, but the first time I had to lead a meeting is to face higher ups...I get very nervous thinking abt it already.

Sigh...I'll see how everything goes tm...crossing my fingers.

On another note, yesterday before my boss left, my body started shaking. I was nervous like I'm going for an interview or something. I had no idea why I was so nervous all of a sudden, and then I figured it must be becuz my boss is leaving. I tried to control my body, but I was just cold and shaky. Hahahha...when my boss said goodbye to me, we gave each other a hug and I wished her all the best. Then I told her I'm very nervous abt her leaving.

First she started to calm me, tells me I can call/email her if I need anything, tells me I can take my time if they throw many things at me and that I should take things easy. As she was talking, her face started to turn red and she started crying. Seeing her cry made my tears came out also, and she looked back at me while walking towards the door. I think she couldn't handle it and quickly said goodbye to everyone and left.

I had an urge to email her today and tell her what happened. But I stopped myself. I think it's time for me to grow up (work responsibility wise) and be independent. My boss believed in me, and I should have more confidence in myself and believe I can do this. When I email my boss next time, I want to tell her that I can handle the new responsibilities and not just whine about how much work they gave me.


A picture on my new iMac!

This entry was posted on January 29, 2008 at 1/29/2008 08:54:00 p.m.. There are . If you want, you can leave your own response by clicking here. You may also send this post to a friend of yours via email, or bookmark it for yourself by using icons below;